Friday, April 24, 2015

Sloth – Rest’s Deleterious Doppelganger

Proverbs 26: 13 – “There’s a lion in the road; a fierce lion roaming the streets!”
You won’t find the phrase “Knock, Knock…Who’s there?” in the Bible. Chickens are mentioned in the Book, but there doesn’t seem to be any interest in the reasons for their travels. Light bulbs were not yet invented. This doesn’t mean there are no jokes in the Bible.
The sluggard saying, “There’s a lion in the streets!” is funny even a few thousand years after it was written. Sure, the joke might have been told differently in another age. In the era of Carson’s Tonight Show it might have been:
“This guy is so lazy…”
“How lazy was he?”
“He was so lazy, he wouldn’t leave the house for fear of shark attacks! Not many Jaws II fans here tonight.”
Okay, maybe not comic gold, but still kinda funny. 
Why do Biblical writers use this kind of material? Because some behaviors deserve mockery. Laziness is one of those behaviors.
“Sluggard” is a great word. Sure, we’re talking English here rather than the original Hebrew; but the image of a slug captures perfectly the slow motion ineptitude of a lazy person. The image of a sloth works pretty good as well. The image here in Proverbs is a guy so lazy that he won’t leave his house, perhaps won’t leave his bed, because of the lamest of excuses. “I can’t go out because… um…because there’s a lion in the street! Yeah, that’s the ticket!”
If Proverbs were written today, the lion might become zombies or an alien invasion. Perhaps, the Stay Puff Marshmallow Man in Ghostbuster proportions. Any lame excuse not to go to work or school or any other effort requiring location.
These days, one might get the impression sloth is no longer an issue. You ask people, “How ya doing?” and often the response is, “I’m so busy! Work, family, all my obligations, I just don’t have any time to spare!” To which we respond ,”Me too!”
Though, perhaps, there seems to be no time to spare, we still spare it. Why else would USA Today always be writing about people binge watching a season of Downton Abbey, The Walking Dead or Banshee over a weekend? Someone is taking the time to read those 50 Shades books. And beds are still very popular locations for stretches exceeding eight hours. Much time in our lives is still lost to sloth.
It is interesting that the writer of Proverbs uses a lion, because many sloths look to lions as immobile role models. A lion can sleep up to twenty hours a day. Is a lion a sloth? (Don’t say Yes or you’ll flunk your biology quiz.)
A lion may well sleep twenty hours in a day, but only after its taken care of its responsibilities. Its responsibilities pretty much consist of finding enough food to eat. If it can do that in four hours or less, its obligations are fulfilled. Most of our obligations are a little more expansive. We need to not just care for ourselves, but for others.
Rest is a valuable part of life, neglecting rest is a dangerous course in life. An analogy can be made to eating. An anorexic endangers his or her own life. A person who neglects proper rest does the same. But being a glutton is not healthy any more than being a sloth. We need that balance in life only God's Spirit can fully provide.

Friday, February 13, 2015

Sure, This Is a Tad Cheesy, But...


The Apostle Peter wrote, "But you are a chosen people, a royal priesthood, a holy nation, God's special possession, that you may declare the praises of him who called you out of darkness into his wonderful light." 
So whether weak or superpowered, you are Incredible in His sight.






Saturday, January 31, 2015

One More Stupid Common TV Show Trivia Game and Then I'll Quit for the Month

What show do "The Wild, Wild, West"'s Robert Conrad and "Night Court"'s John Larroquette have in common?

What show do "Boardwalk Empire"'s Shea Whigham and "Gilmore Girls"' Chad Michael Murray have in common?

What show do "Silicon Valley"'s Martin Starr and "Cougar Town"'s Busy Phillips have in common?

What show do "Barney Miller"'s Ron Glass and "Homeland"'s Morena Baccarin have in common?



Thursday, January 29, 2015

More Stupid TV Trivia - Can you guess the common show without Googling?

What show does Timothy Olyphant of "Justified" have in common with Anna Gunn of "Breaking Bad"?

What show does Tony Danza of "Who's the Boss?" have in common with Danny Devito of "It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia"?
What show does George Clooney of "ER" have in common with Cloris Leachman of "The Mary Tyler Moore Show"?



Tuesday, January 27, 2015

Stupid TV Trivia...What Show Do They Have in Common? Can you guess without Google?

1) What show does James Sikking of "Hill Street Blues" have in common with Neil Patrick Harris of "How I Met Your Mother"?

Tuesday, January 13, 2015

I Already Posted This At Facebook, but...

ACTUAL DREAM: I'm at an amusement park and see Foghorn Leghorn. I say to him, "Boy, I say Boy!" as Foghorn says in the cartoons. The guy playing the Loony Toons chicken takes off his costume head and it turns out he's African American. He starts lecturing me on making racist remarks and asks me to apologize to all the children in the vicinity.

Thursday, January 1, 2015

Direction in the New Year

Garmin and I don't always agree. Not as smart as some GPS systems, Garmin doesn't know about road construction or traffic snafus. Garmin doesn't always understand that we want to see the ocean or the trees. But there are times when we do what Garmin says without question because we have no idea where we're going. Garmin usually comes through.

We'll be relying on Garmin a bit more this year as we begin a new adventure. We're taking our Church Pilgriming on the road, out of Sonoma County, visiting churches throughout California. Just to show (perhaps most of all to ourselves) that we're serious about seeing variety in the state, in the month of January we'll be going to a church as far north as we can, and then to a church as far south as we can go, then east, then west. And we'll be listening to Garmin on those weekends. Not always obeying, but listening.

In this New Year, we'll all be looking for direction one way or another; perhaps for vocation, finances or relationships. Or you might be looking for spiritual direction. You might be looking to grow in your relationship with God. But, of course, there's no spiritual Garmin.

Or perhaps there is. God's "Garmin" tools include Scripture, prayer, mediation, and counsel from wise friends. Perhaps even finding a good church where God speaks to you. Just a friendly traveling tip for the New Year: God's direction, unlike Garmin, always gets you where you need to be.
-- Dean